Joke #1597

Men are like.....Bank Machines. Once they withdraw they lose interest.
Vote:
has 58.09 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: men

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Man walks over to a lady in a bar and asks "whats your name ?" "Carmen" she replies,... "I like cars and men ! Whats yours ?" The man looks her up and down and sayes "Beerpussy ..."
Vote:
has 58.28 % from 93 votes. More jokes about: bar, beer, car, men, sex
A woman didn't come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it. A man didn't come home 1 night. The next morning he told his wife that he had slept over at a friends house. The wife called her husband's 10 best friends. 8 of them confirmed that he had slept over and 2 said he was still there.
Vote:
has 81.89 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: husband, men, wife
A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, there's a piece of lettuce sticking out of my bottom." The doctor asks him to drop his trousers and examines him. The man asks, "Is it serious, doctor?" The doctor replies, "I'm sorry to tell you, but this is just the tip of the iceberg."
Vote:
has 75.27 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: men
"I can't wait for Father's Day" said no man ever.
Vote:
has 66.45 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: Fathers day, men
There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
Vote:
has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: men
After an accident... 1st Driver : I flashed the headlights and told you to let me go first. 2nd Driver : I also started the wipers and said NO NO...
Vote:
has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: men
How are men and parking spots alike? The good ones are always taken and the ones that are left are handicapped.
Vote:
has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: men
John and Bob were inseparable childhood friends. One night, they both died in a terrible car accident. When John woke up in heaven, he began to search for Bob but could not find him anywhere. Very distraught, he ran to St. Peter and said, "St. Peter, I know Bob was killed in that accident with me, but I can’t find him!" St. Peter said, "My son, I am sorry to tell you Bob didn’t make it to Heaven." This upset John so much that St. Peter agreed to let him see Bob one more time. St. Peter parted the clouds and John saw Bob sitting in hell with a keg on one side and a beautiful buxom blonde on the other. John looked at St. Peter skeptically and said, "Are you sure I’m in the right place?" "My son," St. Peter said, "looks can be deceiving. You see that keg of beer? It has a hole in it. You see that woman? She doesn’t!"
Vote:
has 53.18 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, death, heaven, men
A man is moaning to his mate that he never has any luck with pulling women. His mate tells him he has a chat up line that never fails, no matter how good looking the women are he always ends up in bed with them. Great says his mate, what is it! Just walk up to any woman you fancy and say, "Excuse me love, could I ask your opinion! Does this damp piece of cloth smell like chloroform to you?"
Vote:
has 76.27 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: men
Q: The male sex has two hobbies. What are they? A: His left hand and his right hand.
Vote:
has 55.91 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: masturbation, men, sex