Q: Why do men like blonde jokes?
A: Because they can understand them.
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What did God say after creating man?
I can do so much better.
It's Halloween and when the man answers his door, there's a well-dressed young boy there wearing a suit and matching tie, who says "Trick or treat".
The man's a bit confused so he asks the boy what he's dressed up as.
"I'm an IRS agent", says the boy, and with that, he snatches 40% of the candy, and leaves without saying thank you.
One guy says to a bald guy "Your hair ran away to find someone with a brain."
Why can't single women fart?
They don't get an asshole till they get married.
How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with, "A man once told me..."
Why are husbands like lawn mowers?
They're hard to get started, emit foul odors, and don't work half time.
I am a marvelous housekeeper.
Every time I leave a man I keep his house.
A young woman walks into a bar and sits down next to a man wearing a cowboy hat.
"Excuse me sir but are you a real cowboy?"
The man says, "Well I have a ranch and horses. I go to rodeos and raise cattle and other livestock, so yes I suppose I'm a real cowboy."
The woman says, "Well I think I'm a l*sbian. Women are always on my mind whether I'm working eating driving or whatever its still the same. I cant get women off my mind. Yes I think I'm a l*sbian."
The young woman gets up and leaves the coffee shop.
A short time later a young guy comes in and sits down next to the man and asks him, "Sir are you a real cowboy?" To that the man replies, "Well I always thought I was, but just a few minutes ago I found out I'm a l*sbian!"
Q: What is height of Stupidity?
A: A man looking through a keyhole of a glass door.