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Chuck Norris can access the DB from the UI.
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How do two programmers make money?
One writes viruses, the other anti-viruses.
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A blonde girl enters a store that sells curtains.
She tells the salesman, “I would like to buy a pink curtain in the size of my computer screen.”
The surprised salesman replies, “But, madam, computers do not have curtains.”
And the blonde said, “Helloooo…. I’ve got Windows!”
James Bond got this email from a friend:
CanYouPleaseFixTheSpaceBarOnMyKeyboard?
I'm not anti-social.
I'm just not user friendly.
90% of programmer errors come from data from other programmers.
Home is where the wifi connects automatically.
Gmail: Someone has signed into your account!
Me: Yeah that was me
Gmail: No it was on another device!
Me: Yes my tablet
Gmail: Someone stole your tablet?!
Me: What? No!
Gmail: Call the police
Man: Hello, my computer is reporting a fatal error!
Customer Support: Well there's nothing we can do now, you should have called us when it was still critical!
A wife send her husband an sms on a cold winter evening: "Windows frozen".
The husband send answer back: "Pour some warm water over them".
Some time later husband receives answer from his wife: "The computer is completely fucked now".
