Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back?
From crawling across the street when the sign said, "DON'T WALK."
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A blonde was sitting in economy class... on a flight from Seattle to Chicago.
A guy goes to a house of prostitution.
He selects a girl, pays her $200 up front, and he gets undressed.
She's about to take off her sheer blue negligee, when the fire alarms rings!
She runs out of the room, with his $200 still in her hand.
He quickly grabs his clothes and runs out after her.
He's searching the building, but the smoke gets too heavy, so he runs outside looking for her.
By this time, the firemen are there.
He sees one of them and asks, "Did you see a beautiful blonde, in a sheer blue negligee, with $200 in her hand?"
The fireman says, "No!"
The guy then says, "Well if you see her, screw her. It's paid for."
What does a Blonde say during a porno?
There I am!
A Blonde was at a gumball machine.
She put a quarter in and kept getting a gumball out.
The man behind her asked if he could get a gumball.
She said, "Shut up! I'm WINNING!"
Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A: Gifted!
Q: Why do only 20 percent of blonde chicks lay Easter eggs?
A: The rest are hunt'n peckers.
Q: Why did the blonde buy a brown cow?
A: To get chocolate milk.
Q: How does a blonde like her eggs?
A: Unfertilized.
Three blondes witness a crime so they go to the police station to identify the suspect.
The police chief shows them the first mug shot.
"That's not him," the first blonde states.
"This man only has one eye."
The chief is stunned.
"He only has one eye because it's a profile shot."
He repeats the procedure for the second blonde.
"That's not him.This man only has one ear," she answers.
He smacks his head.
"It's a profile shot."
He repeats the procedure for the third blonde.
After viewing the photo, she says, "That's not him. This man is wearing contact lenses."
"How do you know that?"
"Well," she says, "he can't wear glasses with only one eye and one ear, now can he?"
There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette.
They were all trapped on an island and the nearest shore was 50 miles away.
The redhead swam trying to make it to the other shore she swam 15 miles, drowned, and died.
The brunette swam 24 miles, drowned, and died.
The blonde swam 25 miles, got tired, and swam back.