Why is there always hot water at childbirth?
In case of a stillbirth, soup.
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A ship with 30 sailors and one woman strands on a desert island.
After one month the woman says:
"I can not proceed in this way."
And she suicides herself.
After another month, the sailors say:
"We can not proceed in this way."
And they bury the woman.
The next month, the sailors say:
"We can not proceed in this way."
And they dig up the woman.
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Joke has 21.56 % from 123 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, desert island, disgusting, navy
The other day a friend and myself decided to try out an aerobics video because we were both feeling very unfit.
We put the tape in and started to copy the movements.
After a few minutes we had chopped each other's arms off with chain-saws.
It was only then that we realized that I had accidentally put "Psycho Killers III" in the video by mistake!
How we laughed!!!!
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What's the best way to pick up a Jewish girl?
Bring a dustpan to Auschwitz
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A woman is speaking to her friend, ‘My husband has got one foot in the grate.’
‘Don’t you mean one foot in the “grave”?’ says the friend.
‘No,’ replies the woman.
‘He wants to be cremated.’
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I'm going trick or treating with my mum tonight.
It's the only time I can take her out as she's been dead for ten years.
Jerry was in the hospital recovering from surgery when a nurse asks him how he is feeling.
“I’m OK but I didn’t like the four-letter-word the doctor used in surgery,” he answered.
“What did he say?,” asked the nurse.
“OOPS!”
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Why do orphans like playing tennis?
Because it's the only love they get.
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Q: What was Hitler's favorite toy as a kid?
A: An Easy-Bake Oven.
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What's the difference betwee Elton John and Princess Diana ?
One's composing, the other is decomposing.
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Mom and Dad were trying to console Susie, whose dog, Skipper, had recently died.
"You know," Mom said, "it's not so bad.
Skipper's probably up in Heaven right now, having a grand old time with God."
Susie stopped crying and asked, "What would God want with a dead dog?"