Why is there always hot water at childbirth?
In case of a stillbirth, soup.
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Similar jokes
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If you want to feed an injured woodpecker, take it by the tail and hit it to the tree.
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I broke up with my Japanese girlfriend today.
I had to drop the bomb two or three times before she finally got it.
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Q: What do you call a 100 lack people in the ocean?
A: An oil spill
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Why are little girls better than little boys?
Because when you're finished using them as little girls, you can turn them over and use them as little boys.
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First Cannibal: "Have you seen the dentist?"
Second Cannibal: "Yes, he filled my teeth at dinner time."
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John Leslie has been accused of raping a disabled black girl on Blue Peter.
He blamed it on dyslexia & said he thought the script said, use sticky black spastic.
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What's the good part of there being no blacks on the Jetsons?
It means the future will be great!
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While examining the the body of Mr. Schwartz, a mortician notices that Schwartz has the largest penis he has ever seen.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Schwartz," says the mortician, "But I can't send you to be cremated with a tremendously huge penis like this. It has to be saved for posterity."
The mortician removes the penis, places it in a jar and puts the jar in his briefcase. When he gets home, he decides to show it to his wife. "I have something to show you that you won't believe," he says, removing the jar from his briefcase.
"Oh my God!" she screams, "Schwartz is dead!"
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Q: Did you hear Lorena Bobbitt was almost killed in a traffic accident?
A: Some dick cut her off.
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A man goes to the doctor and says "I need birth control for my 10 year old daughter"
The doctor replies "She's 10 years old and sexually active?"
The man says" Active? Hell no! Most of the time se just lies there and cries."
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