Q. What's the difference between men and government bonds? A. Bonds mature.
Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One. Men will screw anything.
What should you give a man who has everything? A woman to show him how to work it
What does a man make best for dinner? Reservations.
How to Impress a Woman: compliment her, kiss her, caress her, love her, comfort her, protect her, hold her, spend money on her, wine & dine her, listen to her, stand by her, support her, go to the ends of the earth for her. How to Impress a Man: show up naked, bring beer.
Q: How many men does it take to open a beer? A: None, it better be open when she brings it to you.
Do you know why men have holes in the end of their penises? So oxygen can get into their brains.
Q: Why did God create Adam before he created eve? A: Because he didn't want anyone telling him how to make Adam.
What's the difference between an intelligent man and a UFO? I don't know, I've never seen either one.
How are men and parking spots alike? The good ones are always taken and the ones that are left are handicapped.