What do most men consider a gourmet restaurant?
Any place without a drive-up window.
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
A man in a pub asks for a beer.
The barman says, "Sure, that'll be one dollar."
"One dollar?" exclaims the man.
Reading the menu, he says, "Could I have steak and chips?"
"Certainly," says the barman, "that'll be two dollars."
"Two dollars?" cries the man.
"You're joking. Where's the guy who owns this place?"
The barman says, "Upstairs, with my wife"."
The man says, "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?"
The barman says, "The same thing I'm doing to his business."
What's the biggest difference between men and women ?
Men are crabby all month long.
Q. Why did the woman bury her husband 12 feet under?
A. Because deep down he's a good person.
How are men like noodles?
They're always in hot water, they lack taste, and they need dough.
"What is a man's idea of a balanced diet?"
"A Budweiser in each hand!"
What did Barack Obama become after his forty-seventh year?
"Forty-eight years old."
Why is it good that there are female astronauts?
When the crew gets lost in space, the woman will ask for directions.
Why did God create man?
Because a vibrator can't mow the lawn.
A couple was having an argument, and the man was losing badly.
After 5 minutes the woman won the argument proving the man to be stupid, the man sadly says
"If my proof falls then I rome through the halls."
Then the woman leaves for 10 minutes and comes back starts giving him a blowjob.
The man is confused and says "what are you doing?"
She said "If I prove you dumb I give ya some."
The man continues to lose a argument knowing he will get a blowjob after 10 minutes, and he did.
Years later they have a kid but none of them want him so they have an argument of who takes care of it and the other leaves for good.
The man without a thought loses the argument the get another blowjob, but after the argument the woman starts rapping
"Yo yo guess who's the kid, not me so suck yourself bitch."
Before she leaves the he says "what about the blowjob?"
She says ask my twin sister that has herpes cause she did it the whole time.
In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman.
Vote: