Q. How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?
A. Both of them.
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Why did the blonde have a sore belly button?
Because there are blonde men too!
"I can't wait for Father's Day" said no man ever.
Vote:
Two men walked into a restaurant, the first one asks for tea.
The second also asks for tea.
"And make sure the glass is clean," he tells the waiter.
When the waiter returns with the two glasses of tea he asks, "Which one of you asked for the clean glass?"
Why do men ask for a woman's hand in marriage?
Because they are tired of using their own.
Why do women make better soldiers?
Because they can bleed for a week and not die.
God gave man his penis and his brain but blood only enough to work one another at a time.
Single women claim that all the good men are married, while all married women complain about their lousy husbands.
This confirms that there is no such thing as a good man.
This confirms too, that women are always confused and don't know what they want.
A nude guy was sunbathing at the beach, a little girl comes to him, he covers his private parts with a newspaper.
The little girl asks, "hats under there?"
So the man answers , "A bird..."
The girl goes away & the man falls asleep. When he wakes up, he finds himself in a hospital & in alot of pain.
A doctor comes up to his bed & asks, 'What happened?'
The man answers, "I don't know. I was at the beach & fell asleep after talking to a little girl."
So the doctor tells this to the Police, and they go to the beach to find any witnesses.
When they got there, they see the little girl the man was talking about.
So they ask her if she did anything to the man...?
She answers, "I din't do anything to the man, but he was sleeping, I played with his bird, After a while, it spat at me, so i broke its neck, burnt its nest, and smashed all its eggs!"
How many men would it take to mop a floor?
No one knows; they've never done it.