What's white and bobs up and down in a baby's crib ? A Pedophiles ass.
Q: What's the difference between Santa Claus and Jews? A: Santa comes down the chimney.
Peter called his doctor’s office for an appointment. "I’m sorry," said the receptionist, “we can’t fit you in for at least two weeks." "But I could be dead by then!" "No problem. If your wife lets us know, we’ll cancel the appointment."
War doesn't determine who is right, war determines who is left.
Me and my wife decided that we don't want to have children anymore. So anybody who wants one can leave us their phone number and address and we will bring you one.
Q: Why do German shower heads have 11 holes? A: Jews have 10 fingers.
An Arabic kid joined my football team. All he did was blow the plays.
There is nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.
Why did Hitler commit suicide? He got the gas bill.
What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One is white, plastic, and dangerous to children. You put groceries in the other.