Two blond girls are discussing:
"Yesterday during the blackout I got stuck in the elevator for three whole hours!"
"Tell me about it! I got stuck too in the escalators."
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Q: What's the idea of a blonde of natural childbirth?
A: No make-up.
As a blonde crawls out of her wrecked car, the local sheriff asks her what happened.
The blonde began, "It was the strangest thing!
I looked up and saw a tree, so I swerved to the right.
Then I saw another tree, so I swerved to left.
Then there was another tree, and another and another ..."
The sheriff thought for a minute and then said, "Mam ... I don't know how to tell you this, but the only thing even resembling a tree on this road for thirty miles is your air freshener."
A blonde goes into a kitchen store and says to an assistant "Can i buy that TV please?"
The assistant says "Sorry we don't serve blondes."
So the blonde goes out and gets her hair dyed and then comes back and says, "Excuse me can i buy that TV please?" and the assistant says "No, because we still know who you are."
So the blonde goes out and gets plastic surgery.
She then comes back and says
"Excuse me, can I buy that TV please?" and the assistant says, "No, because it's a microwave!"
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Q: What did the blonde's mother say when she asked if she could lick the bowl?
A: "Just flush it like everybody else does."
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So I asked a blonde, "Which is closer, Florida or the Sun?"
She said, "The Sun, because I can look up and see it.
Slut - "I hate you bitch"
Blonde - "Your such a slut, I bet your naked under those clothes."
A blonde was walking down the street, carrying a brown paper bag.
She ran into one of her friends.
Her friend asked, "Hey! What do you have in the bag?"
She tells her friend that she has some fish in the bag.
The friend says, "Fish! Well, I'll make you a bet.If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one."
The blonde says, "I'll tell you what. If you tell me how many fish I have in this bag, I'll give you both of them."
What did the blonde get on her IQ test?
Saliva.
The following sign was posted at a fast food restaurant owned by two blondes:
"Parking for drive-through customers only!"