Joke #5205

Q: How do you make seven an even number? A: Take the s out!

Q: You know that awesome feeling, when you finally understand math? A: Me neither.

Son: Dad, it's so cold in here! Father: Go stand in the corner. Son: Why? Father: The corner is 90 degrees.

Chuck Norris can convert kilograms into centimeters.

So Descartes goes into a bar late one night for a beer. At closing time, the bartender makes Last Call and asks him, "Get you another?" Descartes replies, "I think not." And disappears.

Q:What is the difference between a mathematician and a philosopher? A: The mathematician only needs paper, pencil, and a trash bin for his work. The philosopher can do without the trash bin.

Teacher: If 1+1=2 and 2+2=4, what is 4+4? Pupil: That's not fair! You answer the easy ones and leave us with the hard one!

Infinity mathematicians came to bar. First one ordered 1 glass of beer, second a half, third a quarter... The barman interrupted them: "Assholes, here are 2 beers!"

First Caribou: What kind of math do owls like? Second Caribou: Owlgebra.

Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question, "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?" "None," replied Johnny, "cause the rest would fly away." "Well, the answer is four," said the teacher, "but I like the way you're thinking." Little Johnny says, "I have a question for you. If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop, one was licking her cone, the second was biting her cone and the third was sucking her cone, which one is married?" "Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone." "No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking."

Q: Why couldn't the blonde write the number eleven? A: She didn't know what one came first.