Q: You know that awesome feeling, when you finally understand math?
A: Me neither.
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Q:Why do they never serve beer at a math party?
A:Because you can't drink and derive...
Chuck Norris is the only person to know pi, because when he puts it into the calculator, the calculator doesn't dare give him only part of it.
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A helium molecule walks in afterwards. The bellhop asks if he needs any help.
Helium doesn't react.
Q: What's a polygon?
A: A dead parrot.
What do you get when you put root beer in a square glass?
Beer.
A mathematician and an engineer agreed to take part in an experiment.
They were both placed in a room and at the other end was a beautiful naked woman on a bed.
The experimenter said every 30 seconds they would be allowed to travel half the distance between themselves and the woman.
The mathematician said "this is pointless" and stormed off.
The engineer agreed to go ahead with the experiment anyway.
The mathematician exclaimed on his way out "don't you see, you'll never actually reach her?".
To which the engineer replied, "so what? Pretty soon I'll be close enough for all practical purposes!"
Q: Why did the mathbook kill himself?
A: Because nobody understood him.
Math tells us three of the saddnest love stories:
1)Tangent lines who had one chance to meet and then parted forever.
2)Parallel lines who were never meant to meet.
3)Asymptotes who can get closer and closer but will never be together.
2 > 1... unless that 1 is Chuck Norris.
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Q: Do you know why infinity goes on forever?
A: Because it knows Chuck Norris is waiting for it at the end.
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