Joke #5458

Q: You know that awesome feeling, when you finally understand math? A: Me neither.

Count from one to ten. That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you... Forty seven times.

Teacher: "Are you good at math?" Pupil: "Yes and no." Teacher: "What do you mean?" Pupil: "Yes, I'm no good at math!"

The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn't paying attention in class. She called on him and said, "Johnny! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?" Little Johnny quickly replied, "NBC, FOX, ESPN and the Cartoon Network!"

A helium molecule walks in afterwards. The bellhop asks if he needs any help. Helium doesn't react.

One day a blonde came home from school and came to her mother and said, "Hey, Mommy! Mommy! Today in school we learned to count. The other kids could only count to three but I can count to Ten..... 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10!" The mother responds, "Very good honey." The blonde asks, "Is that because I'm a blonde mommy?" And the mother responds, "Yes dear." Next day the blonde came home and went to her mother and said, "Today in school we learned our ABCs! The other kids could only get to D but I can get to K! .... A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K!" The mother says, "Very good honey." The blonde then asked. "Is that because I'm a blonde, Mommy?" The mother responds, "Yes dear." The third day the blonde come home from school and said to her mother, "Mommy today in school we went swimming! But I was the only one who had breasts. Is that because I'm a blonde, Mommy?" And the mother responds, "No Honey, it's because you're twenty five."

A group of blondes were willing to prove that not all blondes were dumb. They established a judges panel of people to ask the questions. On the day of the judging the people started off by asking, "What is 59 + 2?" The first blonde contestant responded by saying, "57?" The rest of the blondes said, "Give her another chance, give her another chance!" Then they asked, "What is 15 - 5?" The blonde responded, "20, right?" Once again the rest of the contestants screamed, "Give her another chance, give her another chance!" The judges decided to go easier on her and asked, "What is 1 + 2?" "Is it 3?" said the blonde. The rest of the blondes said, "Give her another chance, give her another chance!"

Billy: "I was playing basketball and an Asian crossed me." Mark: "Haha, how does an Asian cross you?" Billy: "Because he crosses multiplies."

Q: Did you hear that joke about the infinite line? A: Don’t worry, It doesn’t have a point!

The bartender asks: "Would all three of you like some beer?" The first one replies, "I don't know." The second one replies, "I don't know either." The third replies, "Yes."

Chuck Norris can cross all Seven Bridges of Konigsberg, making all the current laws of Math, obsolete.