Joke #5366

Why did the mirror have 6 holes in it? A blonde tried to shoot herself!
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has 75.89 % from 114 votes. More jokes about: blonde

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A blonde and brunette were watching the 6 o’clock news. The news was about a man about ready to jump off a bridge. The brunette turns to the blonde and says, ” I BET you $50 the man is going to jump.” The blonde replies, “Okay you’re on.” Sure enough, the man jumps, and the blonde gives the brunette $50. The brunette says, “I can’t accept this MONEY. I watched the 5 o’clock news and saw the man jump then.” “No, you have to take it,” says the blonde. “I watched the 5 o’clock news too, but I didn’t think he would do it again.”
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has 66.45 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: blonde, death, money
There was a woman who wanted to repaint her house, so she called the contractor and set an appointment to meet with him. When the contractor came to her house they did a walk-through and he asked her what colors she would like. They came to the living room and she told him that she would like a nice, warm cream color. The contractor wrote something down on his pad, then walked to the window and yelled, "Greenside up." The lady is a little confused, but doesn't say anything, and they continue to the dining room where she tells him, "I would like a nice warm white in here, nothing stark." The contractor writes something down on his pad, then walks to the window and again yells, "Greenside up!" The lady is really confused now but still does not say anything. They continue to her bedroom and she says, "I would like a nice, cool, relaxing blue in here." The contractor writes something on his pad and again walks to the window and yells, "Greenside up." The woman is now totally perplexed and says to the contractor, "Three times I have told you the color that I want, and you write something on your pad, then you walk to the window and yell greenside up. What is going on?" The contractor replies, "You see, I have four blondes laying sod across the street."
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has 74.89 % from 86 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Why did the 3 blondes jump off the building? They wanted to see if their maxi-pads really had wings.
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has 52.49 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Q: What happened when a blonde missed the Q44 bus? A: She took the Q22 twice.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blonde phoned police to report that thieves had been in her car. "They've stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, even the accelerator," she cried out. However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time and the same voice came over the line. "Never mind, I got in the back seat by mistake."
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has 36.86 % from 103 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, cop, phone
How do you break a blonde's nose? Place a dildo under a glass table!
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has 58.52 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Blonde walks into a doctors office and says: "Doctor, what’s the problem with me? When I touch my arm, ouch! It hurts... When I touch my leg, ouch! it hurts... When I touch my head, ouch! It hurts... When I touch my chest, ouch! it really hurts!" The Doctor replies: "Your finger is broken."
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has 85.49 % from 1199 votes. More jokes about: blonde, doctor, health
How did the blonde burn her nose? Bobbing for chips.
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has 9.43 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Did you hear about the two dumb blonds who went two the drive in theater and froze two death they went two see closed for the winter?
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has 33.50 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, death, stupid, winter
Did you hear about the blonde who was treated in the emergency room for concussion and severe head wounds? She’d tried to commit suicide by hanging herself with a bungee cord.
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has 30.41 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: blonde