Old mathematicians never die - they just lose some of their functions.
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There was a blonde who was at an all blonde football game.
At halftime she was called down to answer questions to see if she could win $1000.
The first question was what is 10 plus 11?
She hesitates and says, "hm.. 5!"
The host says "No, I'm sorry thats incorrect."
All of the blondes in the stadium chanted "Give her another chance, give her another chance!"
So the host agrees and said, "Ok how about 5 plus 5."
She answers and says "20".
Again all the blondes chanted "Give her another chance, give her another chance."
So the host agrees again and says, "OK, last chance, what is 2 plus 2."
The blonde says "4!" and the audience says "Give her another chance give her another chance!"
Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.
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Two statisticians go bird hunting.
The first one fires at the bird but overshoots by 5 feet.
The second one fires and undershoots the bird by 5 feet.
They both give each other a high-five and say "Got it!"
There is no logical foundation of mathematics, and Gödel has proved it!
How does a cow do math?
With a cowculator.
Q: Did you hear that joke about the infinite line?
A: Don’t worry, It doesn’t have a point!
"If you had a dollar," quizzed the teacher, "and you asked your father for another dollar and fifty cents, how much money would you have?"
"One dollar." answered little Johnny.
"You don't know your basic math." said the teacher shaking her head, disappointed.
Little Johnny shook his head too, "You don't know my daddy."
Vote:
Why is it hard for a blonde to count to 70?
Because 69 is such a mouthful.
I got 99 problems and being upside down ain't one.
Ok wait I got 66 problems.