Joke #5473

A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there.
Vote:
has 51.08 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: math

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Dear Maths, Please grow up now and solve you problems yourself.
Vote:
has 60.60 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: math
Chuck Norris teaches math to solve its own problems.
Vote:
has 70.84 % from 368 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math, teacher
Did you hear about the mathematician with constipation ? He had to work it out with a pencil...
Vote:
has 48.11 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: math
Why is 69 afraid of 70? Because they once had a fight and 71. 70 is a rumored cannibal but no can prove who 78 78 my ass
Vote:
has 47.06 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: math
An astronomer, a physicist and a mathematician are on a train in Scotland. The astronomer looks out of the window, sees a black sheep standing in a field, and remarks, "How odd. Scottish sheep are black." "No, no, no!" says the physicist. "Only some Scottish sheep are black." The mathematician rolls his eyes at his companions' muddled thinking and says, "In Scotland, there is at least one field, containing at least one sheep, at least one side of which appears black from here."
Vote:
has 66.60 % from 138 votes. More jokes about: animal, math
So Descartes goes into a bar late one night for a beer. At closing time, the bartender makes Last Call and asks him, "Get you another?" Descartes replies, "I think not." And disappears.
Vote:
has 46.00 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: bar, bartender, beer, math
A logician's wife is having a baby. The doctor immediately hands the newborn to the dad. His wife asks impatiently: "So, is it a boy or a girl" ? The logician replies: "yes".
Vote:
has 65.79 % from 115 votes. More jokes about: baby, dad, doctor, math, wife
Q: How many mathematicians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: On average or do you want the whole distribution?
Vote:
has 46.90 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: math
Three men, a philosopher, a mathematician and an idiot, were out riding in the car when it crashed into a tree. Before anyone knows it, the three men found themselves standing before the pearly gates of Heaven, where St. Peter and the Devil were standing nearby. "Gentlemen," the Devil started, "Due to the fact that Heaven is now overcrowded, St. Peter has agreed to limit the number of people entering Heaven. If anyone of you can ask me a question which I don't know or cannot answer, then you're worthy enough to go to Heaven; if not, then you'll come with me to Hell." The philosopher then stepped up, "OK, give me the most comprehensive report on Socrates' Socrates' teachings." With a snap of his finger, a stack of paper appeared next to the Devil. The philosopher read it and concluded it was correct. "Then, go to Hell!" With another snap of his finger, the philsopher disappeared. The mathematician then asked,"Give me the most complicated formula ever theorized!" With a snap of his finger, another stack of paper appeared next to the Devil. The mathematician read it and reluctantly agreed it was correct. "Then, go to Hell!" With another snap of his finger, the mathematician disappeared too. The idiot then stepped forward and said, "Bring me a chair!" The Devil brought forward a chair. "Drill 7 holes on the seat." The Devil did just that. The idiot then sat on the chair and let out a very loud fart. Standing up, he asked, "Which hole did my fart come out from?" The Devil inspected the seat and said,"The third hole from the right." "Wrong," said the idiot, "it's from my asshole." And the idiot went to heaven.
Vote:
has 84.09 % from 2658 votes. More jokes about: car, god, heaven, life, math
Chuck Norris is the only person to know pi, because when he puts it into the calculator, the calculator doesn't dare give him only part of it.
Vote:
has 52.12 % from 103 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math