Joke #5528

Two doctors are having s*x, he says to her, "You must be a surgeon, you washed your hands before and after." She replies, "Well you must be an anesthetist, because I didn't feel a f*cking thing!"
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has 78.60 % from 209 votes. More jokes about: dirty

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A guy walks into a bar and sees a sign that reads: Cheese Sandwich: $1.50 Chicken Sandwich: $2.50 Hand Job: $10.00 He checks his wallet and beckons to the sexy bartender. "Are you the one who gives the hand jobs?" he asks. "Yes," she purrs. "I am." "Well, wash your frickin' hands," says the man. "I want a cheese sandwich!"
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has 68.89 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: bar, bartender, dirty, food, money
A couple wants a divorce, but first they must decide who will be the main guardian of their child. The jury asks both the man and woman for a reason why they should be the one to keep the child. So the jury asks the woman first. She says, "Well I carried this child around in my stomach for nine months and I had to go through a painful birth process, this is my child and apart of me." The jury is impressed and then turns to ask the man the same question. The man replies, "OK, I take a coin and put it in the drink machine and a drink comes out, now tell me who does the drink belong to me or the machine"
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has 75.18 % from 286 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Boy: you left this at my house last night Girl: that aint mine Boy : sorry number 32 I thought you were someone else
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has 31.13 % from 64 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A cowboy walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance then causally looks at his watch for a moment. The woman notices this and asks, "Is your date running late?" "No", he replies,"I just got this state-of the-art watch, and I was just testing it.." The intrigued woman says, "A state-of-the-art watch? What"s so special about it?" The cowboy explains, "It uses alpha waves to talk to me telepathically." The lady says, "What"s it telling you now?" Well, it says you're not wearing any panties." The woman giggles and replies "Well it must be broken because I am wearing panties!" The cowboy smiles, taps his watch and says, "Damn thing's an hour fast."
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has 85.31 % from 1393 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Don't ever let your girl talk to another guy about her problems; a shoulder to cry on, becomes a dick to ride on.
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has 67.41 % from 209 votes. More jokes about: dirty
"I shall call it squishy, and he will be mine. He will be my squishy." "Let go of my boob."
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has 51.98 % from 150 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A lady says to the psychiatrist, "I think I might be a nymphomaniac." He says, "I'll see what I can do to help you. My fee is eighty dollars an hour." She says, "How much for all night?"
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has 84.86 % from 106 votes. More jokes about: dirty, doctor, money, sex, time
Q: What do you call a man who run a cross the road and roll in the dirt then run back across? A: A double dirty crosser.
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has 46.87 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: dirty, men, travel
Yo mama so fat, when your dad tried eating your mom's pussy his head stuck in.
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has 48.13 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex, Yo mama
Kock, Knock Who is there? Suck, suck. Suck, suck who? After a long pause with a low voice: My dick; dear!
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has 22.88 % from 120 votes. More jokes about: dirty, knock-knock, sex