Joke #5602

How are men and parking spots alike? The good ones are always taken and the ones that are left are handicapped.
Vote:
has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: men

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

What did God say after creating man? I can do better.
Vote:
has 56.77 % from 74 votes. More jokes about: god, men
A woman’s husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he said, “You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side… You know what?” “What dear?” She asked gently. “I think you bring me bad luck.”
Vote:
has 67.68 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: business, health, husband, men
A guy walks into an antique store and buys a grandfather clock, he walks out of the shop with it and accidentally walks into a drunk guy. (they both fall over and the clock gets smashed to bits) The guy says to the drunk, "Why don't you watch where your going?" and the drunk says, "Why don't you carry a wrist watch like everybody else?"
Vote:
has 72.04 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: men
The average man is proof enough that women can take a joke.
Vote:
has 60.16 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: men
Men are like a fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something we'd want to have dinner with.
Vote:
has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: food, men, wine, work
Q: How does a man show he is planning for the future? A: He buys two cases of beer.
Vote:
has 45.58 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: beer, men
Two young men who had just graduated from university climbed into a taxi wearing their graduation gowns. "Are you graduates from the city university?" asked the cab driver. "Yes, sir," they announced proudly. "Class of "99." The cabbie extended his hand. "Class of "67."
Vote:
has 66.60 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: graduation, men, time, work
Why is it good that there are female astronauts? When the crew gets lost in space, the woman will ask for directions.
Vote:
has 44.92 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: men, women
This man goes along to the Patent Office with some of his new designs. He says to the clerk, "I'd like to register my new invention. It's a folding bottle." "OK," says the clerk. "What do you call it?" "A fottle, replies the inventor." "A fottle? That's a stupid! Can't you think of something else?" "I can think about it. I've got something else though. It's a folding carton." "And what do you call that?" asks the clerk. "A farton", replies the inventor. "That's rude. You can't possibly call it that!" "In that case," says the inventor... "You're really going to hate the name of my folding bucket."
Vote:
has 35.66 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: men
When a woman gets a vibrator, it's seen as a bit of naughty fun. But when a guy orders a 240 volt Fuckmaster Pro 5000 blowup latex doll with 6 speed pulsating pussy, elasticized anus with non-drip semen collecting tray, together with optional built-in realistic orgasm scream 7.1 sound system, he's called a pervert.
Vote:
has 83.67 % from 135 votes. More jokes about: masturbation, men, women