Joke #5622

A baby snake asked it's mom, "Mommy are we poisonous?" The mother snake responded, "Yes honey, but why do you want to know?" The baby snake responded, "Because I just bit myself..."

Chuck Norris scares cows so bad, milk comes out their nose.

Question: Why does Tigger smell? Answer: You'd smell too if you played with Pooh all day!

What do you call a frog with no legs? It doesn't matter- he won't come anyway.

What do cows usually fly around in? Helicowpters and Bulloons.

First Caribou: Which bug does amazing motor cycle stunts? Second Caribou: Evel Boll Weevil.

What do you call a gigantic polar bear? Nothing, you just run away.

A mother was reading a book about animals to her 3 year old daughter. Mother: "What does the cow say?" Child: "Moo!" Mother: "Great! What does the cat say?" Child: "Meow." Mother: "Oh, you're so smart! What does the frog say?" And this wide-eyed little 3 year-old looked up at her mother and in her deepest voice replied, "Bud."

Q: What is worst than raining black cats and bloodhounds? A: Hailing taxi cabs!

What gas do snails prefer? Shell.

Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse are in divorce court. "Mickey," the judge says, "I'm sorry. I can't grant you a divorce on the grounds of insanity. Minnie seems quite sane to me." "I didn't say she was insane," exclaims Mickey. "I said she was f**king Goofy."