Joke #5863

My Girlfriend wanted me to treat her like a princess for her birthday. So I took her out, got her drunk, and crashed the car.
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has 71.07 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: black humor

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A hunter visited another hunter and was given a tour of his home. In the den was a stuffed lion. The visiting hunter asked, “When did you bag him?” The host said proudly, “That was three years ago, when I went hunting with my ex-wife.” “What’s he stuffed with,” asked the visiting hunter. “My ex-wife” replied the hunter.
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has 80.12 % from 98 votes. More jokes about: animal, black humor, hunting, wife
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says "OK, now what?"
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has 85.36 % from 1679 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, phone
Chuck Norris was hungry so he went to eat a hotdog. When he saw it giggled and said: "What a bad luck! Look what a part of a dog I've to eat!"
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has 48.58 % from 74 votes. More jokes about: black humor, Chuck Norris, dog, food, morbid
Daddy to his son: I don't care if you are dating a black girl - they are all pink on the inside.
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has 42.73 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: black humor
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: "Well, I hope you like changing nappies/diapers". She replies: "Oh my god am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?" To which he responds: "No, you've got bowel cancer."
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has 68.72 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: black humor, doctor, health
A man with no legs is lying on the beach, when three attractive blondes approach him. The first blonde says to him "I bet you've never been hugged before." The legless man shakes his head. Then the second blonde says, "I bet you've never been kissed before." The legless man shakes his head again. Then the third blonde says, "I bet you've never been fucked before." The legless man says, "No." The third blonde replies, "Well you are now because the tide is coming in!"
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has 61.39 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: black humor
Chuck Norris has travelled many places and seen many faces. So too has his boot.
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has 54.31 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: black humor, Chuck Norris, travel
There are only two things to worry about: Either you are well, or you are sick. If you are well, then there is nothing to worry about. But if your sick, there are two things to worry about. Either you will get well, or you will die. If you get well, there is nothing to worry about. But if you die, there are only two things to worry about. Either you will go to heaven or hell. If you go to heaven, there is nothing to worry about. But if you go to hell, you'll be so damn busy shaking hands with friends, you won't have time to worry.
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has 76.91 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, health, heaven
How do you blindfold an Asian? With dental floss!
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has 67.63 % from 264 votes. More jokes about: asian, black humor, racist
Did you hear about the cannibal family who were caught spying by the witch-doctor? They were given a right roasting.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: black humor, doctor, family