I got in trouble during high school for masturbating in the showers.
Apparently it completely ruined the trip to Auschwitz.
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"I want a divorce"!
"But you made a vow in the church that we remain together till death do us part."
"I guess you are right. Very well, go ahead and drink up the tea I made for you."
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How do you make a baby drink?
Stick it in the blender.
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What's black and red, wears high top Reeboks and cant go through a revolving door?
A nigger with a spear through his head.
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Q: What's the nickname for someone who put their right hand in the mouth of a T-Rex?
A: Lefty.
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Q: What's blue and doesn't fit?
A: A dead epileptic.
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Daughter: Dad, this guy told me the sweetest thing ever.
Me: What's that hunny?
Daughter: He said I had nice bumper lights, and a nice trunk.
Me: Tell that niggie if he fills up your gas tank, I'll break his exhaust pipe, ya dig?
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What did the cannibal say when he was full?
I couldn't eat another mortal.
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Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated?
Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.
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How did the dentist become a brain surgeon?
His hand slipped.
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Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable?
A: Getting her out of the wheelchair.
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