Joke #5881

What's black, smells and has 17 tits? The bin bags outside the breast cancer ward.
Vote: has 34.72 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

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One day a miserable toothbrush sits down and says, "Sometimes I feel I have the worst job in the world." Then the toilet paper yells, "Think again buddy!"
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, work
regular ass (_!_) fat ass (__!__) tight ass (!) flat ass (_._) bubble ass (_^_) sore ass (_*_) lop-sided ass (_!__) swishy ass {_!_} surprised ass (_o_) ass that's been around (_O_) kiss my ass (_x_) leave my ass alone (_X_) tired ass (_zzz_) wise ass (_o^o_) unlucky ass (_13_) money out the ass (_$_) dumb ass (_?_)
Vote: has 75.62 % from 79 votes. Send joke:

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Why did the zombie baby cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.
Vote: has 35.66 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, baby, disgusting
A little old lady sits at the luncheonette counter and orders a hamburger. The huge guy behind the counter bellows, "One burger!" Whereupon the chef grabs a huge hunk of chopped meat, stuffs it in his bare armpit, pumps his arm a few times to squeeze it flat, and then tosses it on the grill. "That's the most disgusting thing I've ever seen," the old lady says. "Yeah?" says the counterman. "You should be here in the morning when he makes the doughnuts."
Vote: has 66.46 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

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What do gays call hemorrhoids ? Speed bumps.
Vote: has 37.45 % from 40 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, health
I got home to see my two months pregnant wife crouched in the bathroom crying. Her red, smudged eyes looked at me as she told me she'd lost the baby. I told the silly thing not to be so upset, I could clearly see it in the toilet.
Vote: has 52.49 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: baby, disgusting, wife
Two brunettes and a blonde are attempting to fix a roof. While they are on the roof, a herd of cattle run by and knock down the ladder and leave a big pile of poop behind. The two brunettes decide to make the blonde check how deep the poop is so they can jump down. So the blonde jumps down and yells, "It's only ankle deep." So the two brunettes jump down and scream, "What are you talking about?! It's up to our heads!" And the blonde replies, "Well, I jumped in head first."
Vote: has 64.88 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

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Three guys compare their levels of intoxication from a party the previous night. The first guy says, "Man, I was so drunk last night, I went home and blew chunks." The second guy says, "I was so drunk last night, I woke up this morning on my front porch." The third guy says, "I was so drunk last night, I took a prostitute home to my wife." The first guy exclaims, "You guys don't understand! Chunks is my dog!"
Vote: has 80.76 % from 239 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, dog, drunk, party, wife
What's grosser than gross? A bloody mary with curly, brittle hairs in it!
Vote: has 39.90 % from 9 votes. Send joke:

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A cowboy rides in the desert and comes upon a Native American lying naked with a hard-on. He asks, "What are you doing?" The naked man replies, "I'm finding out the time -- it is 12:15." The cowboy looks at his watch and thinks, "Wow, it really is 12:15." The cowboy continues and sees another Native American lying naked with a hard-on. He asks, "What are you doing?" The naked man replies, "I'm seeing what time it is -- it is 3:15." The cowboy looks at his watch and that is the correct time. The cowboy continues and finds a third Native American lying naked on the ground, masturbating. The cowboy asks what he's doing and he replies, "I'm winding my watch."
Vote: has 71.00 % from 49 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: cowboy, disgusting, masturbation, time