Joke #5973

So the buddhist pulls a gun out of his coat and the vendor says, "Whoa whoa whoa, what about inner peace?". The Buddhist responds "This is my inner piece".
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has 76.32 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: life

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Dentist (to the patient: "For God’s sake, stop making those noises and waving your arms. I haven’t even touched your tooth yet." Patient: "Yes, I know. But u’re standing on my foot."
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: doctor, god, life
A popular motivational speaker was entertaining his audience. He said: "The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife!" The audience was in silence and shock. The speaker added: "And that woman was my mother!" Laughter and applause. A week later, a top manager trained by the motivational speaker tried to crack this very effective joke at home during a small party. He was a bit foggy after having a drink or two. He said loudly, "The greatest years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who was not my wife!" The wife went red with shock and rage. Standing there for 20 seconds trying to recall the second half of the joke, with the guests not saying a word, the manager finally blurted out "... and I can't remember who she was!"
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has 83.05 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: life, management, memory, time, women
TV commercials now show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem.
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has 61.01 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: life
Growing up, Samuel L. Jackson didn't have a mother and a father. He had a mother and a motherf*cker.
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, family, life
The best thing about trying to name a baby is realizing how many people you hate.
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has 44.74 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: baby, life
"What is love, at last?" asks the dentist. And the cardiologist: "Love is a toothache.. but inside the heart!"
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has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: life, love
Q: How did the hail stone describe its life? A: It really has a lot of ups and downs.
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has 67.81 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: life, weather
I may look calm, but in my mind I have killed you three times already.
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has 66.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: life
When a White guy is... Scared- He gets even whiter. Cold- He turns Blue. Angry-He turns Red. Stoned- Gray duh. Sick- He turns Green. When a Black guy is... Scared- He stays Black. Cold- He stays Black. Angry- He stays Black. Stoned- He stays Black. Black Man to White Man: And you calling us colored.
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has 74.19 % from 471 votes. More jokes about: life, white people
Two boys were talking and the one said to the other, "There is a easy way to get what you want." The other boy said, "How?" the boy replied, "Tell people you know their secret." The boy jumps up and runs to his dad, "I know your secret!" The dad replies, "Please don't tell your mom heres $10." The boy then runs to his mom, "I know your secret!" The mom said, "Please don't tell your dad here's $15." The boy then decides to try it on the mail man, "I know your secret!" The mail man opened his arms and said, "Come, give your dad a hug!"
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has 84.18 % from 206 votes. More jokes about: dad, life, money