Joke #3231

I sent my young son to pick up ice cream, I handed him some money and a coupon. Later he came home with the ice cream and the coupon. When I asked him what happened, he replied, “Mom I had enough money. I didn’t need the coupon.”

I went to the psychiatrist, and he says "You're crazy." I tell him I want a second opinion. He says, "Okay, you're ugly too!"

I did so much crack, one day I broke in my own house. I ain't lying. I was halfway out the door with the TV before I realized it was my place. And before I broke in, I used to stand outside and case the joint. Finally, I said, "Damn, this brother will never come home!"

Our folk not only knows how to read between the lines but also how to leave a record between the eyes.

Sometimes, during the movie previews, I'll turn to the stranger sitting next to me and whisper, "We should really go see that together."

Lebron better than Jordan? Ha! Yea right. Talk to me when Lebron saves the looney tunes from an alien race.

You know you're ugly when you get handed the camera every time they make a group photo.

How do you know which one is your boss from a crowd of 500 people? You say: “My boss is a stupidest asshole!”

The fastest dialog in the world: (WC door is opening) Man inside: Heyyy! Man outside: Sorryyy!

This could be considered the ideal world for many men: His son on the cover of a box of Wheaties. His mistress in the centerfold of Playboy. A picture of his wife on the milk carton.

Employer: "We need someone responsible for the job." "Sir your search ends here! In my previous job whenever something went wrong,everybody said I was responsible."