Chuck Norris can arrive anywhere without actually leaving.
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Chuck Norris can win a football game by spiking a tennis ball over a volleyball net.
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Bill Gates once asked Chuck Norris to be his personal body guard for an hour, he couldn't afford it...
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Chuck Norris uses gasoline as aftershave just for the pleasant tingling sensation.
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Chuck Norris can run so fast he can cause time travel.
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What every sports player should say after winning?
"First of all, I would like to thank Chuck Norris for not competing."
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Chuck Norris found the fountain of youth, but...he wasn't thirsty.
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Chuck Norris is who killed Kenny.
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Yoda used to be 6 feet tall till he tried that Force crap on Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once ran on the treadmil.
It couldn't keep up.
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When Chuck goes into outer space his head doesn't pop, space pops around his head!
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