Chuck Norris can arrive anywhere without actually leaving.
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When Chuck Norris donates blood, he gives twenty gallons.
None of it is his own.
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You don't invite Chuck Norris.
He invites himself.
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Chuck Norris can do the splits in mid air,rotate his hips 360" so fast it lifts him off the ground thus making the Chuck Copter!
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When Chuck Norris plays sudoku, he can put two same numbers in one square and still solve it right.
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Chuck Norris lights campfires with fire ants.
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When Chuck Norris was a baby he didnt have teddy bears. He had real bears.
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Chuck Norris doesn't expect the unexpected.
He knows the unexpected.
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Chuck Norris was once bitten by a venomous cobra ....
After 5 days of excrutiating pain the cobra
Eventually died
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The Playstation Network is down because Chuck Norris unplugged his PS3.
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Chuck Norris paints little red wagons for a living with his victim's blood.
But not the wheels.
That's just wrong.
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