A man took a poop in a gas station and then realized there was no toilet paper.
There was a hole in the wall and a sign above it that read: "When you go to the bathroom, wipe yourself with your index finger, stick it through this hole and it will be thoroughly cleaned."
The man did exactly what the sign said, but when he stuck his finger through the hole, someone at the other side slapped two bricks together against his finger and because of the pain he stuck his finger in his mouth and started to suck on it.
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A: Pussy farts.
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A: The blowjob.
You can beat your wife, your eggs, or your meat; but you just can't beat a blowjob.
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What's better than 10 dead babies in 1 bag?
1 dead baby in 10 bags.
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Q: Who is brave?
A: He who has diarrhea and wants to fart!
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Q: What did Jeffrey Dahmer do after dumping his boyfriend?
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One's a cunning runt.
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What does a cannibal eat with cheese?
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Once upon a time there were these two bums walking down the railroad tracks, and the first bum, Fred, thought he smelled a nasty old smell. He asked his companion, Jeff, ''Did you s**t your pants?''
"Hell no," Jeff said.
They walked a few more miles and the smell got worse.
"Did you s**t your pants, Jeff?"
"I swear to the God almighty I did not s**t my pants," Jeff said.
So they walk three more miles and the smell gets just horrible.
Fred runs over and pulls down Jeff's pants and says, "I thought you said you didn't s**t your pants?!"
"I didn't." Jeff said.
"They're your pants."
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Q: What do you call a Shih-Tzu mixed with a poodle?
A: A Shih-Tzpoo.
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One day a miserable toothbrush sits down and says, "Sometimes I feel I have the worst job in the world."
Then the toilet paper yells, "Think again buddy!"
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