Q: What does a twelve-pound mouse say to a cat?
A: ‘Here Kitty, kitty, kitty’!
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store.
The parrot said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly."
Well, the lady is furious!
She stormed past the store to her work.
On the way home she saw the same parrot and it said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly."
She was incredibly ticked now.
The next day the same parrot again said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly."
The lady was so ticked that she went into the store and said that she would sue the store and kill the bird.
The store manager replied, "That's not good," and promised he wouldn't say it again.
When the lady walked past the store that day after work the parrot called to her, "Hey lady."
She paused and said, "Yes?" The bird said, "You know."
If God didn't want us to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of food.
What do you get if you cross a longhorn with a knight?
Sir Loin.
Q: What do you call cattle with a sense of humor?
A: Laughing stock.
What is the golden rule for cows?
Do unto udders as you would have udders do to you.
There was a man driving a pickup truck down a country road, when suddenly he was broad sided by a trailer truck.
Some time went by, and the case got to court.
The defense attorney said to the plaintiff, "How can you be suing my client now when you told a trooper after the accident that you felt fine?"
The man replied. "Well sir, it was like this. We was driving down the road, minding our own business, when a big trailer truck came out of nowhere and creamed us. When I came to, I was in the ditch, and a trooper was pulling up with his car. He looked at the hogs, and they was most dead, so he shot them. Then he looked at my dog, and he was hurt real bad, so he shot him."
Then he came over to me and he said, "How you feeling?"
I said, "I never felt better in my life."
Did you hear about the man who received a tip on a horse called Cigarette?
He didn't have enough money tabaccer!
What do you call a rabbit that plays with foxes?
A dumb bunny.
Q: What's long and thin and covered with skin and nobody knows how many holes its been in.
A: A worm.