Q: What does a twelve-pound mouse say to a cat?
A: ‘Here Kitty, kitty, kitty’!
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Chuck Norris can make a turtle go faster.
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Q:Where do you find giant snails?
A:On the ends of their fingers.
Two lawyers walking through the woods spotted a vicious looking bear.
The first lawyer immediately opened his briefcase, pulled out a pair of sneakers and started putting them on.
The second lawyer looked at him and said, "You're crazy! You'll never be able to outrun that bear!"
"I don't have to," the first lawyer replied. "I only have to outrun you."
What did the naughty rabbit leave for Easter?
Deviled eggs.
How does a frog confuse you?
When he comes out and says he needed that nap and feels much better.
Q: What do you call a cow during an earthquake?
A: A milk shake.
Chuck Norris is the reason why This Little Piggy cried wee wee wee all the way home.
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Why is a reindeer like a gossip?
Because they are both tail bearers.
When Chuck Norris wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken.
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