Joke #9882

Why did the farmer fence in the bull? The farmer had too much of a steak in him to let him go!
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal

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Chuck norris can eat chicken tonight tomorow.
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has 32.62 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
A man climbed over a fence into a field to pick some flowers. He noticed a bull nearby. Say, farmer "Is that bull safe?" "Well, he's a lot safer than you are right now!"
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has 62.04 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: animal
Two snakes are talking. One of them turns to the other and asks, "Are we venomous?" The other replays, "Yes,why?..." "I just bit ma lip."
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has 57.16 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris doesn't eat honey. He chews bees...
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has 46.70 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
Why did the frog walk across the road? He didn't... he jumped.
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has 27.71 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q. How does a frog confuse you? A. When he comes out and says he needed that nap and feels much better.
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has 17.55 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
How do you lead a horse to water? With lots of carrots.
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has 44.46 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
Q: What did the emu say to the nurse? A: Mend her bones or walk the plank
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has 25.74 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, nurse
There was a hysterical call at the fire department, and it went like this: "Help me, please help me! There is a cat meowing and yowling with frequency and urgency. It is going to hurt me, it's going to kill me, can you please help me, and send the fire squad right away?" "Take it easy, cats don’t hurt us, just relax wait until he leaves." "You don’t understand it is going to bite me, it is going to kill me, it is going to be fatal!" "Cats aren’t like snakes or spiders that are poisonous, by the way who is calling?" "I’m Josephine’s parrot you jerk!" "Help me please, please help!"
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has 72.87 % from 126 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, death, parrot
"Oh, please excuse me!" said the bunny. "I didn't mean to trip over you, but I'm blind and couldn't see you there." "That's perfectly all right," replied the snake. "It was MY fault. I didn't mean to trip you, but I'm blind too, and I didn't see you coming. By the way, what kind of animal are you?" "Well, I really don't know," said the bunny. "Since I'm blind, I've never seen myself. Perhaps you could examine me and then we'll both know?" So the snake felt the bunny all over and said, "Well, you're soft and cuddly; you have long silky ears, a fluffy little tail and a twitchy little nose... you must be a bunny rabbit!" The little blind bunny was so pleased with this that he danced with joy. The bunny said, "I can't thank you enough. What kind of animal are you, sir?" The snake said he didn't know, for the same reason. The bunny agreed to examine him, and when he finished the snake asked, "So, what kind of animal am I?" The bunny said, "You're hard, you're cold, you're slimy, and you haven't got any balls. You must be a lawyer."
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has 81.65 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: animal, health, lawyer