Joke #9882

Why did the farmer fence in the bull? The farmer had too much of a steak in him to let him go!
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Two men are approaching each other on a sidewalk. Both are dragging their right foot as they walk. As they meet, one man looks at the other knowingly, points to his foot and says, "Vietnam, 1969." The other points his thumb behind him and says, "Dog crap, 20 feet back."
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How can you tell a rabbit from a skunk? A skunk uses a cheaper deodorant.
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Q: What is a black cat's favorite color? A: Purrrrrr-ple!
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Dog rules 1. If I like it, it's mine. 2. If its in my mouth, it's mine. 3. If I can take it from you, it's mine. 4. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine. 5. If I'm chewing something up, all the pieces are mine. 6. If its mine, it must never appear to be yours anyway. 7. If it just looks like mine, it's mine. 8. If I saw it first, it's mine. 9. If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine. 10. If its broken, it's yours.
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Q: What happens when you cross a pig with a Democrat? A: Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.
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Why do you never see zebras or antelopes at Victoria Station? Because it's a mane-lion station.
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Did you hear about the man who ate nothing but oats every day? He fell in love with the Grand National winner!
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More jokes about: animal, food, love
When a bull wants to listen to a cassette, what does he put on his head? Steer phones.
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A baby hedgehog lost itself, in the garden. Sad, he strolls from here to there, whereupon he bumps in a cactus and full of hope he says: Mama, is that you?
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What would happen if tarantulas were as big as horses? If one bit you, you could ride it to hospital!
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More jokes about: animal, hospital