A doctor complains to his colleagues about the sanitary problems at a latex glove factory in Mexico. "Workers stick their hands in melted latex and then dip their hands in a vat of cooling water to solidify the latex. The glove is then thrown in a finished products box." His colleagues are disgusted by the lack of care taken in keeping the gloves sanitary. "That's not all," says the doctor. "You don't even want to know how they make their condoms!"
Q: What's the similarity between a woman and dog poop? A: The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
Q: Why did the gay guy think his lover was cheating on him? A: He came home shit faced.
Q: What's the hardest thing about a sex change from a man to a woman? A: Inserting the anchovies
Q: What did the pedophile say when he was released from prison? A: "I feel like a kid again."
This is a visual joke. Blow some cigarette smoke into a shoe, what do you have? A palestinian waiting for the bus.
A woman walks into her doctor's office and says, "Doctor, I need to lose weight fast." And the doctor says, "Instead of putting food in your mouth, try putting it up your butt." Two months later she comes in and says, "Doctor, it's a dream come true. I'm half the size I was." But the doctor notices that she is bouncing up and down up and down... and he asks, "But where did you get this twitch?" The woman replies, "I don't have a nervous twitch, I'm chewing bubble gum."
A good looking woman walks into a bar wearing a tube top. She raises her hand to signal the bartender for a beer, revealing that she does not shave her armpits. Meanwhile, a sloppy drunk on the other side of the bar signals the bartender, "Buy that ballerina over there a drink on me." The bartender replies, "What makes you think she's a ballerina?" "Because," answers the drunken man, "any chick that can lift her leg that high has GOT to be a ballerina."
One man says, "I can't believe they are still together after all that crap." The other man says, "Who?" The first man says, "Your butt cheeks."
What does Michael Jackson call a Tickle-Me-Elmo doll? Bait!
Q: What do you get when you mix cigarettes with hot water? A: A soggy butt.