Joke #6931

Why did God give women legs? So they don't leave a trail like a slug.
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A guy is late to meet with his friends at the local bar the friends obviously ask why he is late and he responds: "Wow, you won't believe what just happened. So I take the usual route via the rail tracks and suddenly I see a young, naked woman tied up next to the tracks." The friends are curious and ask: "Well, what happened next?" The guy says: "Of course I untied her and we had sex because I freed her." The friends are cheering and one friend asks: "Soo... did you get any head?" The guy says: "No, I couldn't find it..."
Vote: has 73.01 % from 84 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, morbid, sex, women
Take a squirt gun into the rest room stall next to someone and shoot little drops over the wall every couple of seconds while pretending to pee.
Vote: has 69.96 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: April fools, disgusting
How do you know when your sister is on her period? Your dad's dick tastes like blood.
Vote: has 37.92 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dad, disgusting, sex
Three little boys were sitting around talking about their fathers. The first boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings." The second boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings out of his nose." The third boy said, "Well, my dad can blow smoke rings out of his butt." The first and second boys where amazed. The second boy said, "Have you seen him do it?" "No," said the third boy, "but I've seen the tobacco stains on his underwear."
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More jokes about: dad, disgusting, fart
Two girls take a walk on a hot summer day. They see an old lady sitting in front of her house eating watermelon. They notice she isn't wearing any panties. "Is it cooler without panties?" they ask. She says, "I don't know if it's cooler, but it sure keeps the flies off the watermelon."
Vote: has 78.11 % from 94 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, disgusting, food
Q: What does a plumber need to know about his job? A: Sh*t runs downhill and payday is on Friday.
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More jokes about: disgusting, work
Q: How do you know when there is a snowman in your bed? A: You wake up wet!
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More jokes about: disgusting, winter
Q: Why did the bald man cut holes in his pockets? A: He wanted to run his fingers through his hair.
Vote: has 54.59 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

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Little Johnny comes home one day and says, "Mom! Little Mark next door has a penis like a peanut!" "What do you mean, Johnny? Is it shaped like a peanut?" "No," says Johnny. "It's salty."
Vote: has 75.34 % from 130 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, gay, little Johnny
A farmer and a son live on a farm. The farmer is sitting in the kitchen when his son comes in from the barn with a large glass of white liquid. He is so excited because he's just milked a cow. Then he takes a big drink from the glass. His father just stares at him. "Son, we don't have a cow. We have a bull."
Vote: has 77.88 % from 156 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, disgusting