Chuck Norris is so fast that when he runs, he can see his back.
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Last year Chuck Norris won the prize for best float at the Carnival in Rio simply by walking in the parade wearing his cowboy hat.
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Chuck Norris lights campfires with fire ants.
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When Chuck Norris opens a bottle of coke happiness runs away screaming.
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Chuck Norris donates his beard clippings to the Army so they can make Kevlar vests.
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Stevie Wonder was the last person to stare Chuck Norris directly in the eyes...
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Ckuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet...he scares the shit out of it.
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Chuck Norris likes his coffee half and half: half coffee grounds, half wood-grain alcohol.
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Chuck Norris once entered a black hole just to see what was in it.
Dissapointed, he then walked out.
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Chuck Norris runs until the Treadmill gets tired.
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Chuck Norris protects his body guards.
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