Joke #7195

Q: What's the difference between a brown-noser and a sh*thead? A: Depth perception.
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A guy says, "Doc, you gotta help me. Every time I fart, it sounds like, "Honda." The doctor says, "You say, 'Honda?'" "No," the guy says. "My farts do." So, the doctor says, "OK, open your mouth," and looks inside. After about two minutes, the doctor says, "I'm sorry, I can't help you, you need to go see a dentist." The guy says, "Why a dentist?" The doctor says, "Because you have an absessed tooth." The guy says, "What the hell does that have to do with my condition?" The doctor says, "Well, didn't you know? Absess makes the farts go Honda!"
Vote: has 37.27 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

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what is the diffrent between a chicken and a prostute chicken goes cockadoodle do prostute goes any cock will do.
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One day in the city a bus driver was making his usual stops. At the first stop a woman came to the front of the bus to get off. She turned to the bus driver and said, "I think I was just molested back there." The bus driver looked at her and said, "Not on my bus. You couldn't have been." So, he lets her off and drives on. He comes to the next stop and another woman comes to the front to get off. She, too, looks at the bus driver and says, "I think I was just molested back there." Now the bus driver thinks that something has to be wrong, to get two complaints like this in one day is just unheard of. He gets up out of his seat and goes to the back of the bus. To his surprise there is a bald guy crawling on the floor on his hands and knees. The bus driver says, "Sir, what are you doing?" The man looks at him and says, "I lost my toupee. I thought I found it twice, but I lost it again."
Vote: has 68.73 % from 49 votes. Send joke:

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How do you make a dead baby float? Take your foot off of it’s head.
Vote: has 30.15 % from 98 votes. Send joke:

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An old couple is on a walk, when a pigeon flies by and relieves himself on the woman's head. "Yech!" says the woman. "Get some toilet paper." "What for? He must be half-a-mile away by now."
Vote: has 60.56 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What did the pedophile say when he was released from prison? A: "I feel like a kid again."
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That moment when you notice that one fork isn't really very clean when you're laying the table and you have to decide which family member you like the least.
Vote: has 63.17 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

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What’s sicker than driving over a baby? Skidding.
Vote: has 28.81 % from 51 votes. Send joke:

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What do you call an incestuous nephew? An aunt-eater.
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

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If I wanted to hear from an a**hole I would fart.
Vote: has 54.59 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

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