Q:How do sport players stay cool in game?
A:They stay in front of some fans!
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Why is someone who borrows money but does not pay it all back like a football player?
Because sometimes he gives you a quarter back and sometimes a half back.
I'll never understand how you can come up second in a biathlon.
I mean – you've got a gun, haven't you?
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Using only a black king, Chuck Norris defeated the world-champion grand-master in chess.
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Yo mama so fat when she was swimming in the ocean the indians claimed her as the new land.
The Golfer asked his Caddy, "Hey boy, do you think it is a sin to play golf on Sunday?
Caddy replied, "The way you play, Sir, its a crime any day of the week!"
"Waiter, these noodles are a bit crunchy."
Waiter: "That's because they're the chopsticks, sir."
Two men have been sitting out on a lake all day long, ice fishing.
One has been having no luck at all and the other has been pulling fish after fish out of his hole in the ice.
The man having no luck finally leans over and asks the other what his secrect is.
"mmmmm mmm mm mmm mmmm mmm mmm."
"I'm sorry, what did you say?"
"mmmmm mmm mm mmm mmmm mmm mmm."
"I'm sorry, I still didn't understand you."
The successful man spits something into his hand.
"You've got to keep your worms warm."
The Karate Kid killed caught a fly with two chopsticks, Chuck Norris killed a rhino with one.
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Golfer: "I'd move heaven & earth to break 100 on this course."
Caddy: "Try heaven; you've already moved most of the earth."
Chuck Norris once won a three-legged race... By himself.
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