Q: What can popsicles do that men can't? A: Come in five flavors.
Two hunters are stalking through the forest when one says to the other that he has to take a dump. "Well, go in the bushes." "What should I use to wipe my ass?" "Use a dollar bill." A few minutes later the hunter steps out of the bushes with s**t all over his hands. "What happened?" asks his friend. "I didn't have a dollar bill, so I used four quarters."
Yo mama is so stinky that she scared the fly's off the shit wagonrn.
what is the diffrent between a chicken and a prostute chicken goes cockadoodle do prostute goes any cock will do.
If I wanted some comeback, I'd wipe it off your chin!
I have a green nose, three red mouths, and four purple ears. What am I? Ugly!
Q: How do you embarrass an archaeologist? A: Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from
How do you make stew out of a leper? Put him in a Jacuzzi and turn it on full.
A mother is making a cake for her three sons when she accidentaly dropps some BB from the shelf into the batter. She decides that it won't matter and continues to make the cake. Later that day, her sons eat the cake and don't even notice the BBs. The next day, when the mother is reading a magazine on the couch, one of her sons runs in saying, "Mom, mom, I pissed out a beebee!" She says "That's okay, son. I accidentaly dropped some beebees into the cake batter. You'll be fine." Five minutes later, one of the other sons, come running in and he says, "Mom, mom, I.." But the mother cuts him off and she says, "I know, I know, you pissed out a beebee. I dropped it into the cake batter, but you'll be fine." Then her last son runs in the room, and he says, "Mom, mom, I.." And the mother cuts him off and says, "I know, I know, you pissed out a beebee. It's my fault for dropping it in the cake batter, but you'll be fine." But then son says, "No, no, I was masturbating and I shot the dog!"
What's the warmest organ in a dead woman's body? My dick.
At a rally John McCain was asked if he wore boxers or briefs. He replied, "Depends."