Q: What can popsicles do that men can't?
A: Come in five flavors.
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Q: What does it look like when you microwave a baby?
A: I don't know, I close my eyes when I masturbate.
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It was the kindergarten teachers birthday and the students decided that they would each buy their teacher a gift.
The first student, whose parents own a florist shop, gave her a present.
She held it and said "I guess that it is flowers".
"How did you guess?" asked the little boy.
She laughed and thanked him.
The second student, whose parents own a candy store, gave her a present.
She held it and said, "I guess that is some candy."
"How did you guess?" asked the little boy.
She again laughed and thanked him also.
The third student, whose parents own a bottle shop, gave her a box which was leaking.
The teacher touched the liquid with her finger and tasted it.
"Mmmmm is it wine?" she asked.
"No," said the little girl.
So she tasted it again.
"Is it champagne?" she asked.
"Noooo," replied the little girl, "It's a puppy."
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What do you call an incestuous nephew?
An aunt-eater.
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Q: What's the difference between hockey player and hippie girl?
A: Hockey player will take shower after 3 periods.
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Q: What do you give an elephant with diarrhea?
A: Lots of room.
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what is the diffrent between a chicken and a prostute
chicken goes cockadoodle do
prostute goes any cock will do.
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What's red and sits in a corner?
A baby playing with a razor blade.
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You might be a redneck if you think taking a bubble bath starts with eating beans for dinner.
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Q: How do you embarrass an archaeologist?
A: Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from
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Q: Why did the gay guy think his lover was cheating on him?
A: He came home shit faced.
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