Joke #2496

How is a blond with makeup called? Simpleminded picture.
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has 9.15 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: blonde

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Did you hear what the blonde who was opening a new bar said when her lawyer explained to her that she needed a liquor license?  "Oh, it's not gonna be THAT kind of a bar. That's disgusting!"
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has 65.91 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: bar, blonde, disgusting, lawyer
Postcard from a blonde: Having a wonderful time. Where am I?
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has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: blonde, holiday
A policeman pulls a blonde in a sports car over for speeding and is trying to explain to her what and where her driver’s license might be. After she eventually gives him her driver’s license, he asks for registration. Getting another blank blonde look from her, he explains, “It’s that little piece of paper you get with your car and you keep it in the glove compartment.” “Ah,” she says as she bends over to get it. While she is looking through the glove compartment, the officer unzips his pants and pulls his cock out. Excited that she had found her registration, she turns around and looks up. A look of dismay crosses her face and she says, “Oh, no! Not another breathalizer test!”
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has 50.64 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: blonde, cop
Q: How did the blonde die at the baseball game? A: She drowned during the wave.
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Why did the blonde put her finger over the nail when she was hammering? The noise gave her a headache.
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has 32.54 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blonde goes to an international message center to call her mother. When the man tells her it will be $300, she exclaims, "I don't have that kind of money, but I'll do ANYTHING to get a message to my mother." He tells the blonde to follow him and takes her into a back room. He unzips his pants and takes out his penis. The blonde gets on her knees, brings it toward her mouth and says, "Hello? Mom?"
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has 68.26 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Two blondes fell down a hole. One said, "It's dark in here isn't it?" The other replied, "I don't know; I can't see!"
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has 84.72 % from 563 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Did you hear about the blonde who was treated in the emergency room for concussion and severe head wounds? She’d tried to commit suicide by hanging herself with a bungee cord.
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has 35.23 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: blonde
A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out. Her boss, concerned about his employee's well being, asks sympathetically, "What's the matter?" The blonde replies, "Early this morning I got a phone call saying that my mother had passed away." "I'm terribly sorry to hear that. Why don't you go home for the day... we aren't terribly busy. Just take the day off to relax and rest." The blonde very calmly explains, "No, I'd be better off here. I need to keep my mind off it and I have the best chance of doing that here." The boss agrees and allows the blonde to work as usual. "If you need anything, just let me know," he says. A few hours pass and the boss decides to check on the blonde. He looks out over his office and sees the blonde crying hysterically. He rushes out to her, and asks, "Are you going to be okay? Is there anything I can do to help?" "No," re plies the blonde, "I just got a call from my sister, and she said that HER mom died too!"
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has 79.34 % from 184 votes. More jokes about: blonde, death, phone, work
There was blonde who wanted to go on a diet. She went to the doctor and asked for his advice. He said that she was going to go on a diet for three days. "Eat anything and everything you want for the first two days of your diet. Then skip the third day." So the blonde went home and ate anything and everything she wanted for the first two days, then she skipped the third day. The next day she went back to the doctor and he asked her, "How is your diet?" She said, "Well, the first two days were easy but that third day was hard. Doing all that skipping made me really tired."
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has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: blonde