Q: What do the Starship Enterprise & toilet paper have in common?
A: They both circle Uranus searching for Klingons.
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Similar jokes
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Q: Why was the condom flying through the air?
A: It got pissed off.
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I don't like the term "anal bleaching".
I prefer "changing your ringtone."
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Q: What's the similarity between a woman and dog poop?
A: The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
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Q: How do you piss off a man?
A: Stand on his back and piss.
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Why did the semen cross the road?
Because I wore the wrong sock today.
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There was a vampire who walked into a vampire bar and asked the bartender for a glass of hot water.
The bartender asked what for, because everyone else was drinking blood.
The vampire pulled out a bloody tampon and said "TEA TIME!"
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Q: What's the difference between driving in the fog and eating pussy?
A: At least when you are eating pussy you can see the asshole in front of you.
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It's a really hot day and this penguin is having car trouble, so he takes it into a garage.
The penguin asks, "How long will it be?"
The mechanic says, "Just a few minutes."
So the penguin decides to go get an ice cream at the grocery store across the street.
When the penguin gets there he climbs inside the big freezer door and starts to eat ice cream.
Three hours go by before the penguin looks at his watch and jumps out of the freezer and races back to the garage.
With ice cream all over his face and his stomach he says, "So, how's my car?"
The mechanic comes walking out wiping his hands on a rag and says, "Looks like you blew a seal."
The penguin says, "No, no, no, I was just eating ice cream."
Q: What is the difference between a gay guy and a fridge?
A: The fridge doesn't fart when you take out the meat.
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I have a green nose, three red mouths, and four purple ears.
What am I?
Ugly!
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