Q: What do the Starship Enterprise & toilet paper have in common?
A: They both circle Uranus searching for Klingons.
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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs.
A: Ground Beef!
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There was a young man from Peru
Who fell asleep in a canoe
He dreamt that Venus
was strokin' his penis
And woke with a handfull of goo
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"Mommy, Mommy! Where have all your scabs gone?"
"Shut up and eat your corn flakes."
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Silence is golden.
Unless you have an infant.
Then its probably blue.
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What do you call a masturbating cow?
Beef Stroke-n-off
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Q: What do you get if you cross a bear with a toilet?
A: Winnie the Pooh.
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What is the sharpest thing in the world?
A Fart.
It goes through your pants and doesn't even leave a hole.
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Him: "I'm going to come and see you, I don't care about the gas prices or anything I'm coming to no matter what."
Her: "Aw okay, I'm going to get ready."
Him: "I love you, I can't wait to see you, I'm getting ready to leave."
Her: "Okay honey, I'm on my period, just letting you know."
Him: "My car just blew up, I can't come see you."
Her: "Get your friend to bring you, he always does."
Him: "He got shot I can't come, sorry."
Her: "Never mind I'm not on my period, my panties are just red."
Him: "My boy said he is okay, he's going to take me, I'm going."
Her: "I'm really on my period."
Him: "Damn! He got shot again..."
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Joke has 56.36 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: communication, disgusting, friendship, love, relationship
What did the tampon say to the other tampon in school?
I'll see you next period.
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3 bums were outside a bar.
The first one went in and asked for a fork.
The second one went in and also asked for a fork.
Then the third one went in and wanted a straw.
At this point, the bartender became curious.
"How come all your friends want forks and you want a straw?"
"Well," the bum said, "the dog threw up and the chunks are all gone."
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