Joke #829

My penis was in the Guiness Book of Records... until the librarian kicked me out.
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has 75.99 % from 1487 votes. More jokes about: dirty

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Teacher: And therefore, sperm cells are made up of glucose. Student: So you're saying that sperm has sugar in it? Teacher: Technically. Yes. Student: But it doesn't even taste like that... Teacher: what? Student: what?
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What did one tit say to the other? I hope we get support soon or people will think we're nuts.
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Yo momma so fat when I crawl in her pussy I can't find my way out.
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"Does your ass have Allstate insurance?" "No, why?" "Well, do you want it to be in good hands?"
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has 70.17 % from 114 votes. More jokes about: dirty, flirt
Kock, Knock Who is there? Suck, suck. Suck, suck who? After a long pause with a low voice: My dick; dear!
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has 23.04 % from 123 votes. More jokes about: dirty, knock-knock, sex
Chuck Norris never gets dirty. The dirt is too afraid to even touch him or his clothes.
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One day little Jonny was at his house asleep until he heard his parents arguing and his mom called the dad a "bastard" and the dad called the mom a "bitch". So little Jonny asked, "dad what does bitch and bastard mean?" Then his dad said it meant "ladies and gentlemen." So the next day little Jonny was upstairs in his room until he heard his mom moaning. He walked into their room and the mom said "feel my titties" and the dad said "choke on my dick". Little Jonny asked, "dad what does titties and dicks mean?" So his dad said "coats and jackets." Then it was Thanksgiving and they were having family over for the day and Little Jonny went upstairs and heard his dad say "shit!" Because he had cut himself. And Little Jonny said, "dad what does shit mean?" So his dad said "it means wiping shaving cream off my face." So little Jonny went back downstairs and his mom was in the kitchen stuffing a turkey and she yelled: "fuck!" So little Jonny asked, "what does fuck mean?" And she said "stuffing the turkey." Then the doorbell rang, and Little Jonny opened the door and said: "hello bitches and bastards put your titties and dicks on the coat racket, my dads, upstairs wiping the shit off his face and my moms in the kitchen fucking the turkey!"
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has 69.07 % from 146 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, little Johnny, Thanksgiving, vulgar
Your mama is so stupid, when she lost her dildo she called the cops to look for it.
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has 40.15 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: cop, dirty, sex, stupid, Yo mama
I had a visitor one night… he explored my body… licked, sucked, swallowed & had his fill… when satisfied he left… I was hurt… Damn mosquito!!!
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Why did the semen cross the road? Because I wore the wrong sock today.
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has 55.64 % from 82 votes. More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, masturbation