When Chuck Norris donates blood, he gives twenty gallons.
None of it is his own.
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Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
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Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one.
When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face.
We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.
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Chuck Norris doesn't do cocaine.
Cocaine does Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once jumped. Now we have seven Continents and a tilted planet.
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They said that a picture is worth a 1000 words, a picture of Chuck Norris is worth a 1000 ways to die.
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The saying "Kill two birds with one stone" actually came from when chuck Norris downed two Peregrin Falcons with one roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris once gave a cop a ticket for speeding.
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Chuck Norris doesn't play computer games,the computer plays Chuck Norris games.
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When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
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Chuck Norris believes in victim's rights.
His victims have the right to dig their own graves before he kills them.
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