When Chuck Norris donates blood, he gives twenty gallons.
None of it is his own.
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Chuck Norris doesn't just bring home the bacon, he brings home the whole pig.
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The city of Dallas wanted to name a major street Chuck Norris Boulevard but decided against it because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives!
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Chuck Norris once made a crippled man run away.
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Chuck Norris is the only person able beat a fish at holding his breath under water.
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Chuck Norris can sink a hole in none!
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Chuck Norris caught the gingerbread man.
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Chuck Norris once ate a bottle of sleeping pills.
They made him blink.
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They said that a picture is worth a 1000 words, a picture of Chuck Norris is worth a 1000 ways to die.
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Chuck Norris has no need for a TV remote.
He stares at his television, until it changes the channel.
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If Chuck Norris was a villian in a video game, you'll never win.
But if he was the hero, it's unplayable; because no one controls Chuck Norris.
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