Aliens fear that Chuck Norris might abduct them.
There was no Big Bang at the beginning of the Universe, Chuck Norris simply sneezed.
Chuck Norris doesn't smoke cigars. He smokes smoke grenades.
Chuck Norris sleeps until he tells the sun to get up.
Chuck Norris is the ultimate hide and seek player; no one dares find him.
Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murders in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
The cake is a lie, Chuck Norris is THE TRUTH.
Chuck norris plays frisbee with his retinas.
Lehman Brothers owed Chuck Norris a fiver. When he asked for payback, well, you know the rest.
Chuck Norris can swim in an empty pool.
Chuck Norris knows who let the dogs out.