Chuck Norris can lift up a chair with one hand... While he's sitting on it...
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Chuck Norris can make love to a girl so hard and fast it inspired a reality tv series.
We know it as Forged in the fire.
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The real reason that Oprah is ending her show on television is that Chuck phoned and said "That's enough!"
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Chuck Norris didn't shoot the sheriff, but he roundhouse kicked the deputy.
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During vacation my front door's open and I left a note saying "This house is protected by Chuck Norris 3 days a week you guess which 3."
All was good.
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You can lead a horse to water, but Chuck Norris can make it drink.
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Chuck can use "save" in real life.
But he doesn't need it.
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Chuck Norris can win at solitaire with only 18 cards.
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Chuck Norris has his own protien powder.
The ingriedients include: cocoa powder, stem cells, dodo egg protien, enriched uranium, LSD, and Vin Diesel.
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The last time Chuck Norris was hungry, all the dinosaurs suddenly got extinct...
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Simon doesn't say... Chuck Norris says.
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