Chuck Norris can lift up a chair with one hand... While he's sitting on it...
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Chuck Norris can turn on clapper lights by flexing.
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The Grinch didn't really steal Christmas.
He just hired Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris's wish isn't your command, Chuck Norris's command is your wish...
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Wonder Woman's magic Lasso is actually one of Chuck Norris' chest hairs.
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Two things in life are certain: Death and a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris' Facebook status has a dislike button...nobody clicks it.
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Ozzy Osbourne once snorted a line of ants.
Chuck Norris once snorted a line of bricks.
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On Halloween, children give Chuck Norris candy.
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Chuck Norris doesn't run out of bullets, bullets run out of Norrises.
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When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn’t get charged.
He holds up the phone and money falls out.
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