Yo' Mama is so uptight, you need the jaws of life to part her legs.
Yo mama's feet are so ashy, it looks like she kicks flour for a living.
Yo mama so stupid that when I was drowning I yelled out to her that I needed a life saver and she said "Cherry or grape?"
Yo mama's so poor when she heard about the last supper, she thought she ran out of food stamps.
A French guest, staying in a hotel called room service for some pepper. "Black pepper, or white pepper?" asked the concierge. "Toilette pepper!" came the reply
Yo mama so scary, every time someone throws shots, she calls the police.
Yo mama so fat the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures.
A grandmother is watching her grandchild playing on the beach when a huge wave comes and takes him out to sea. She pleads, "Please God, save my only grandson. I beg of you, bring him back." And a big wave comes and washes the boy back onto the beach, good as new. She looks up to heaven and says: "He had a hat!"
You mama is so fat when we went to the beach the whales sang, "We are family."
Yo' Mama is so nasty, her vagina's in the Axis of Evil.
Guy goes every day to the same diner, looks over the menu, and always orders the same thing: ham and eggs. Every day, the same thing: ham and eggs. Waitress decides to play a trick on him and scratches it from the menu. He comes in, she says, "You know that thing you like so much? I scratched it." "Well, wash off your hand and get me some ham and eggs."