Chuck Norris once drank wine from a chalice. This chalice is now known as the holy grail.
Chuck Noris can make grapes from wine.
Why did satan die before judgment day, Chuck hated him.
Women are just like fine wine. I only like the white ones.
Chuck Norris haunts ghosts.
Q: Why can't atheists solve exponential equations? A: Because they don't believe in higher powers.
Chuck Norris invented his own brand of media disc. The Black and Blueray.
Little April was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through the class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?" When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. "GOD ALMIGHTY!" shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back asleep. A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and Saviour," But, April didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. "JESUS CHRIST!" shouted April and the teacher said, "very good," and April fell back to sleep. Then the teacher asked April a third question. "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time April jumped up and shouted, "IF YOU STICK THAT F*****G THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME, I'LL BREAK IT IN HALF AND STICK IT UP YOUR ARSE!" The Teacher fainted.
The following conversation took place in school. Teacher: "So we are all descended from Adam and Eve." Young kid: "My dad says we came from apes." Teacher: "That's probably true for your family Abdul."
Chuck Norris is the only man to punch a cyclops between the eyes.
Q: How big are the pastro's beds? A: Oh c'mon, it knows every little kid.