Chuck Norris once went to practice his golf swing at a driving range... his golf balls are now known as stars!
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Did you ever wonder how the moon got craters?
3 words: Chuck Norris Golf.
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Chuck Norris bowled a perfect game...
While using a golf ball.
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Chuck Norris just completed a full round of Golf... In 17 shots.
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Chuck Norris stopped playing golf after that unfortunate incident with the dinosaurs.
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Jesus is the son of God.
God is the son of Chuck Norris.
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After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris.
It was more "humane".
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The room was full of pregnant women and their partners.
The Lamaze class was in full swing.
The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe properly, and informing the men how to give the necessary assurances at this stage of the plan.
"Ladies, exercise is good for you," announced the teacher.
Walking is especially beneficial. And, gentlemen, it wouldn't hurt you to take the time to go walking with your partner!"
The room was very quiet. Finally, a man in the middle of the group raised his hand.
"Yes?" asked the instructor.
"Is it alright if she carries a golf bag while we walk?"
Chuck Norris just checked out from 501... In 8 darts.
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Two strangers meet on a golf course and decide to play together.
One man says, "I'm a salesman. What about you?"
"I'm a hit man for the mob," replies the second man.
He pulls out a high powered rifle loaded with scopes and sights.
He then asks the man where he lives.
Nervously, the first man replies, "In a subdivision just west of here. Gray roof, yellow siding."
"You got a silver compact and a red pickup?"
"The compact is my wife's car, but that's my buddy Jeff's truck."
The hit man looks through the scope again. "Well, they're going at it like teenagers in your bedroom."
"I want you to shoot her in the head and shoot him in the balls."
The hit man says, "I get paid $5,000 per shot."
"I don't care! Just do it!"
The hit man takes careful aim and says, "This is your lucky day. You're going to get a two for one!"
Chuck Norris once threw a pebble.
We now call it...Hayley's Comet.
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