Chuck Norris can hear the sound of one hand clapping.
When Chuck Norris rides into the sunset, the sun is actually running from him.
Curiosity didn't kill the cat. Chuck Norris did.
Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris is the only person who can kick someone in the back of the face.
Chuck Norris doesn't break bricks. They fold under pressure.
Global warming is caused by transient energy leftover from Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks.
Chuck Norris once had to go to court...the judge got life in prison.
Chuck Norris won a game of chess with checker pieces.
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
I got a tattoo of Chuck Norris on my own leg... now it won't stop roundhouse kicking me in the face.