Chuck Norris can hear the sound of one hand clapping.
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Chuck Norris invented the internet so that he could reach his enemies, preferably ninjas.
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When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off
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When you come to a road that says "ONE WAY", that mean Chuck Norris is the other way.
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Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
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Chuck Norris doesn't lift weights he tells his muscles to get bigger.
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When a mime sees Chuck Norris, he makes a glass wall and pretends he's dead.
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Chuck Norris was once asked to place his legs and fists in the cargo bay of a plane because weapons aren't allowed in the cabin.
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Chuck Norris got swept over Niagara Falls...
He liked it so much, he swam back up and did it again.
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Chuck Norris is the only person that can make you feel a punch to your face in your groin.
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Osama Bin Laden is hiding from Chuck Norris.
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