Chuck Norris abducts aliens.
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Superman got his powers when Chuck Norris sneezed on him.
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Everyone knows the speed of light...
Chuck Norris knows the speed of darkness.
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Chuck Norris won one million dollars gambling playing Solitaire.
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Every time Satain goes to sleep, He has to pray to God hoping Chuck Norris does't get him at night.
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When Chuck Norris pokes you on Facebook, you die.
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Chuck Norris doesn't daydream.
He's too busy giving other people nightmares.
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Gravity is Space's way of trying to keep Chuck Norris away from it.
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Chuck Norris's 1st Grade teacher asked him how many stars there were on the American Flag.
Chuck Norris replied "Yes." and was correct.
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Kim Kardashian use to be 8 feet tall until Chuck Norris uppercut both her feet and that is why her ass is so big.
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Chuck Norris went to the virgin islands.
Now they are pregnant.
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