The only reason you woke up this morning is because Chuck Norris allowed you too.
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The cake is a lie, Chuck Norris is THE TRUTH.
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Chuck Norris doesn't break bricks.
They fold under pressure.
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When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack.
Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.
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Chuck Norris recently got himself an iPad.
It turned into iDust when he tried to use it.
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Chuck Norris shot an arrow down with an apple.
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Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill.
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Chuck Norris won a guitar battle with a violin.
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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
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Chuck Norris knows the last number of infinity.
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Nuclear weapons were discovered after a failed attempt to harness the power of Chuck Norris.
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