Joke #9492

Chuck Norris does not fart, nothing escapes Chuck Norris.
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Depending on the circumstances, Chuck Norris will decide whether or not his farts will stink. If he chooses to have them stink, he will then also determine the appropriate percentage level of rankness delivered based on the demographics of the attending audience.
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Chuck norris farted in a ditch and the grand canyon was created.
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Chuck Norris eats gummy bears and shits out grizzly bears.
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The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
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A man farts in bed next to his wife. His wife asks, "What in the world was that?" He replies, "Touchdown. I'm winning, seven nothing." She decides to get even, so she lets one loose. He yells at her, "What was that?" She replies, "Touchdown, tie score." He wants to get her back, but he tries so hard he sh*ts in bed. The wife asks, "Now what in the world was that?" He replies, "Halftime, switch sides."
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Suicide committed Chuck Norris.
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Q. How do you know when you are getting old? A. When you start having dry dreams and wet farts.
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Why do women always fart only when they go to the bathroom? They have to blow dry—and there's nothing to shake.
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What's gross? Farting in the bathtub. What's grosser than that? Catching the bubbles with your teeth.
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Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
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