One step forward, 12 floors down.
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A sadist, a masochist, a murderer, a necrophile, a zoophile and a pyromaniac are all sitting on a bench in a mental institution.
"Let's have sex with a cat?" asked the zoophile.
"Let's have sex with the cat and then torture it," says the sadist.
"Let's have sex with the cat, torture it and then kill it," shouted the murderer.
"Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it and then have sex with it again," said the necrophile.
"Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it, have sex with it again and then burn it," said the pyromaniac.
There was silence, and then the masochist said: "Meow."
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Q: What is the difference between baby and knitting?
A: Knitting is weaved by two needles and one ball, but the baby has been made with one needle and two balls!
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First cannibal: "I can't find anything to eat!"
Second cannibal: "But the jungle's full of people."
First cannibal: "Yes, but they're all very unsavory."
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Q: How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: I don't know, there are twenty in my basement, and my basement light still isn't fixed.
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I'll never understand how you can come up second in a biathlon.
I mean – you've got a gun, haven't you?
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Mummy, mummy, why is daddy swaying in the backyard?
Shut up, and give me more bullets.
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Why do orphans like playing tennis?
Because it's the only love they get.
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Don't make 9/11 jokes, my dad died at the twin towers.
The best damn pilot in Saudi Arabia.
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A blind man with a guide dog comes to a town square, takes the dog by the tail and starts whirling him around.
„What on earth are you doing?!" asks a passer-by.
The blind man replies, „Nothing, just looking around a bit."
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Q: How do you stop a lawyer from drowning?
A: Shoot him before he hits the water.
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