Chuck Norris's GPS still can't find him.
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Chuck Norris can make his own reflection vomit with fear.
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Chuck Norris can cross all Seven Bridges of Konigsberg, making all the current laws of Math, obsolete.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a License to drive a car...
The car needs a special license to be driven by Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris touched a Prius, it turned into a Ferrari
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Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people.
They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.
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Bruce Lee is the only person that lived from a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris.
He died a year later.
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A black hole is created when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks a sun.
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In America, Chuck Norris finds you But in Soviet Russia, you find Chuck Norris.
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The only reason you woke up this morning is because Chuck Norris allowed you too.
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When Chuck Norris opens a bag of Doritos, it's fucking full!
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