Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
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Freds voice is high because Chuck Norris kicked him in the nuts.
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When a Jedi dies they become part of the force, when the force dies it becomes part of Chuck Norris.
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Dreams about Chuck Norris are in 4D.
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Human cloning is outlawed because if Chuck Norris were cloned, then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe.
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Chuck Norris created Heavy Metal when he was upset.
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Chuck Norris once fell off a ladder, it immediately became a chair and caught him out of fear.
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We only submit these facts so he doesn't kill us.
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Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two-tons, breathes fire, and could eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing.
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A kid once tried to scare Chuck Norris on Halloween... sadly he has had the hiccups now for 40 years.
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Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant.
The steak did what it was told.
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