According to CNN, Chuck Norris was commanding the SEAL team in Afghanistan.
When Osama found that out, he shot himself in the head.
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Chuck Norris doesn't daydream.
He's too busy giving other people nightmares.
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Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murders in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
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Death once had a near Chuck Norris experience.
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The world did not have a tilt in its axis until Chuck Norris stubbed his toe on the North Pole.
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Chuck Norris uses live piranhas as bath toys.
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Bigfoot thinks Chuck Norris is a myth
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We'll want to preserve Chuck Norris for future generations, when he dies.
We won't be needing cryogenics cos Chuck's already frozen.
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How far can you spit.
Try to beat Chuck Norris if you ask how far can he spit, at night look at the moon and don't wonder from were the craters come.
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Chuck Norris doesn't prepare dinner; dinner knows when to be ready.
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Chuck was once on the Olympics and he won all the medals but he was disqualifyed for roundhouse kicking the judges because they misspelled his name.
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